Growing up, I generally hated "evil" things and was seen to be mostly a good guy by my peers. "Wicked" was the last thing I would describe myself then so I felt that when I die, I deserve to go to Heaven. I'd stay in Purgatory maybe for a while but then eventually, I'll reach Heaven. I wasn't really scared of going to Hell then.
Most of the time, if guilt crept in, I'd just do something "good" and then just feel good after. Paranoia may creep in to think if I should do more, just to make sure. Now, I know why that happens.
It's simple, I can't save myself from my self. By instinct, I would always choose things to preserve my being. And that paranoia is there because no matter how many good things I do, I can't have a complete sense of peace.
Original Sin has found its way in me the moment I was born. And even if you don't understand or believe in it, can you relate with the paranoia or have you had that inner voice experience?
In whatever way you make sense of things, God's Truth is found in Ephesians 2:8, 9. I can only be saved from my sinful nature by accepting this gift from God. I don't deserve it, but His Grace He has extended to me. The condition is for me to believe in it, through faith, and to accept Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and Savior. It is a gift, it is not by what I have done, not by what i can do.
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